A girl is learning the alphabet in a War Child class in Afghanistan. Photo Kiana Hayeri / War Child UK

The effects of growing up female in a war zone

Meet Mimi, a War Child UK Youth Advocate from Libya. Her poem ‘Weak’ shows the effects of growing up female in a war zone.

My name is Mimi, and I grew up in Libya. 

I now live in London and I'm a War Child Youth Advocate. 

I have faced a lot of sexism in my everyday life. Experiencing discrimination made me feel weak. 

But I was luckier than most. 

Education allowed me to overcome this "weakness". Being able to go to school—what I considered my safe zone—and being able to express my feelings and opinions without consequences was my form of liberation. 

 

Education is power. It's time for change. 

Most females are not allowed to pursue their education for as long as I did.  

For those living in war zones this is absolutely the case, with 25 million children affected by conflict currently unable to access schools. 

Education taught me that I'm not inferior to men. I have value. 

 A girl in a child-friendly space in the Central African Republic. Photo: Arete / War Child UK
Arete / War Child UK

Education gave me the tools to stand up for what I believed in. I felt powerful. And maybe that’s why so many girls have their education taken away. Societies and cultures change when girls are afforded this opportunity. Education is power. It's time for change. I am supporting War Child who, last year, reached thousands of children affected by conflict with education, from children fleeing ISIS in Iraq fled Mosul in Iraq, to reintegrating child soldiers in the Central African Republic. Below is a poem I have written for International Day of the Girl, based on my personal experiences growing up in a conflict zone.

"Weak", a poem by Mimi Swehli 

 

We are told as we grow that the organs which we possess will control our behaviour and all the rest. 

We are told as we grow that a girl is silent and well behaved and that running around shouting, like males do, was not something we should crave. 

We are told as we grow that we are fragile and weak and that the males are the ones that will protect us and ensure we rise to our feet. 

We are told as we grow things that we pretend don’t affect us. We will prove them wrong; we will show them justice. 

But if you are told you are weak time and time again, you begin to believe it because society will play with your head. 

You try to play with the boys at school, because running around hitting a football is second nature to you. And yet, we are told as we grow that being a woman is inferior, that female organs are our barriers. That these sport games we wish to play are only the beginning of things we cannot do. Because somewhere along the line someone decided that this wasn’t for you. 

We are told that our country needs protecting, that it was time to stand up and show the world the oppression. 

We are told its the males that will bring us victory. And the women? Well, they should be at home because they can’t make history. 

We are told that harming girls isn’t okay, but why do so many men get away with rape? Because if you are told you’re weak time and time again, you begin to believe it. After all, society can play with your head. 

We are told, even by our very own mothers, that we cannot do what our male counterparts could. We are told that any man would always be strong and that they can get away with far more things than we could. 

We are told and brought up in a culture which praises men, giving them a head start at life because of the thing between their legs. They go around feeling "all mighty and strong" and treat girls anyway they want. I’ve had a friend shot dead because she did not give her number, I’ve had another who was beaten but was forced to stay with him because he was her "lover". 

We are told as we grow, even if never directly so that a man’s word was always above ours. And that he was always sorry for his poor actions and misplaced power. And he never meant to hurt you, but you are just a delicate little flower. 

We are told as we grow that a man could never harm us, after all they were the ones that helped us rise to our feet. But what if I’m strong and you made me weak?